I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
