Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
