Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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