Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
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What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
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You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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