im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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