i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
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