Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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