Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready