Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
just come out here and I will go home with you...
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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