I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
