Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
