you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Randomize
