I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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