He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
