There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I think your dad took our porno
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
