I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
please don't ironically join a cult
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