Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
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Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
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Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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