But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
he quoted the bible to break up with me
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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