Pregnant stripper...not hot.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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