Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
