so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
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i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
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who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
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