so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
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