so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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