I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
