I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
True strength comes from lack of pants
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
