i may or may not be watching the land before time
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
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