i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
