I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Let the clothes fall where they may.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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