Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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