3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
