awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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