I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
he fucked my hip out of place.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize