Me. At least after what I've been through.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
