I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
