Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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