i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
