A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
