my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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