Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
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