We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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