You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Randomize
