WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Screwed.edu
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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