He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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