Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
