Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
