Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
