WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I deserve this hangover.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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