I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I need moral support for this bender
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Randomize
