drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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