you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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