Sponge bath it is.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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